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▸ BROKEN. ... ♬
Thursday, May 10, 2012
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Deep down inside, it's broken.
Suffered second blow few days back.
Guess you didn't ever think of how I will feel inside.
It's broken.
But, I have already forgive you.
Do not why I forgive people so easily.
But it still hurts.
Do u even know?
Doubt so.
You still can blame me.
:)
............................
Got no comments.
Hope you will keep your promise.
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▸ FOOL. BIGGEST FOOL. ... ♬
Tuesday, May 08, 2012
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Biggest Fool.
indeed I'm .
I Discover another lie today.
You expect me to understand?
HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO UNDERSTAND
when you are telling lies and lies all over and over again?
When we met, I already asked you.
I won't mind if you have told me the truth.
But you didn't and I found out today,
NOW.
You will never knows how I feels.
I'm the biggest biggest fool.
You will never talked to me like this,
You have never be so sweet to me before.
:)
My heart is really aching.
I'm really tired.
Really tired of everything.
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▸ Long tiring day... ... ♬
Sunday, May 06, 2012
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Going to church is great.
Went out today but I didn't get to buy what I want to buy.
Didn't found anything great.
Except for nail polish :((
Recently have been very depress.
Really need a getaway as soon as possible.
To kill away all these stress.
:)
After so long you are still the same old you.
Forget it,
Why bother for someone who don't even cares.
I need someone who loves me more more....
Who will give me surprises,
Who will make me happy,
Who will be there for me.
Who is willing to do anything to make me smile.
Is it that hard? :(
I believe god's will plan everything for me.
i shall pray and pray every single day.
:)
<3 God's.
he is always there.
No matter what he will listen to your prayers.
& Lord please bless my health,
my knee every single thing.
BLESS EVERYONE BESIDE/AROUND ME ! :D
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▸ Dear God's... ... ♬
Saturday, May 05, 2012
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Its, a purple day.
It's been a long long time since I blog with colors..
It's been also a long long time, since my world is colorful. :)
With all the things happening around me,
With all the negative thoughts pilling inside me.
I'm afraid one day I can't take it...
And decided to .. just leave.. :)
I know I can't think this way anymore,
I need to be strong.
At least I will try.
Because I have no choice...
But God's...
我好累了。。
真的。。
没有人理解，我的心。。
已经很累很累了。。
一年多的我，以为他是不一样的。。结果。。
犯了所有男人都会犯的错。。
为什么。。。
Why is human heart so complicated?
Why..
Do people can change so fast over a few days.
I do not know. .
Do not want to think, it's so painful. ...
Let the pain go away lord..
Please.. Help me.. heal my heart ache....
Take away my nightmares...
Heal me..
God's guide me...
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▸ Disappointed ... ♬
Friday, April 27, 2012
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Receive a damn shocking news from you.
Got nothing to say because in front of me, looks like a total stranger.
It's actually sad to say this after knowing you for 1 yrs 8 months or longer.
:)
I actually do not know you that well.
DO NOT ever think that you will do this.
To a young kid.
Never ever gonna think of this.
And to say that you still love me after doing this?
Seriously, are you like slapping your own cheeks?
You told me you liked her, yet you say you love me.
I still remember, you ONCE told me. .
Like is like, interested is interested, that means you already fall in love with the
person.
Without having me in your heart.
It's just less than a month since we separated.
Yet this happened.
It's hard to believe my ears.
After all now then I know, you are still not matured yet.
Not at all.
:)
Or maybe I don't even understand you.
真的好陌生。
现在的你好陌生。。
我对你太失望了。。
After all, guys are still the same.
Once I thought, you are different, I can trust you at least on that.
These 1 yr plus, you are not romantic, you kept me at home.
Fine, I stayed at home.
BUT, now you prove me wrong.
REAL wrong.
I was wrong to think that some guys are still good.
At least there are guys who wont go around fcuking girls.
Who won't cheat.
Yes you didn't cheat, but you disappoint me.
By what you did.
可能是时候该放手了。。
All these while, you said you didn't trust me.
Said I will still cheat on you.
In the end? ?
You are the one who do all these...
I can say proudly even we broke up JUST 1 week, i didn't do anything like what you did.
That I can proud to say.
Oh ya,
It's because you like her, :)
In just 1 week.
WOW,
our 1 yr plus relationship is junk to you .
Seriously I do not know why am I still bothered by all these.
Alright, enough of rantings.
Shall go rest soon.
Prepare for night shift tomorrow.
Leave is coming soon.
:) can't wait can't wait.
Lord, guide me and give me a strong heart.
To withstand everything happening.
AMEN!
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▸ The link of memories. ... ♬
Saturday, April 21, 2012
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Went out for the whole day, tiring day but at least I'm outside.
:)
Prevent myself from thinking so much anyway.
Legs gonna break today, regret wearing heels to outing.
Hectic day of walking almost half day and taking train.
:(((
Legs full of blisters and injuries, no more heels anymore.
pain pain !
Do not know why,...
In the middle of the night, memories strike hard in my head.
I need to be strong, he is living well. So I must also live well too.
It's always easy to say, hard to do.
Miss those times where by I will be pat to sleep.
Tugging in the blanket in his cold room.
Swimming in the ONLY ME swimming pool.
Wearing bikini for only him to see.
Eating my favorite bean curd. (cravings) thou don't know when then can eat.
Times where we play APB till late time.
Where we used to bathe together.
Plenty plenty. . .
I believe, God's will guide me to the place I need to go.
:)
My heart will also lead me to where my final stop is.
I believe.
No more thinking. brain gonna b dead soon.
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▸ MOODY SUNDAY AGAIN. ... ♬
Saturday, April 14, 2012
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I know it's not right to have the urge to take MC again. Especially after a PH off day.
BUT, my mood seems to be like a swing, going ups and downs.
I thought, i'm strong, I have recovered.
But I guess I can't bluff myself.
I have not yet recovered...
1 yr 7 months . . . not long and not short.
Suddenly, Randomly. . .
I will think of how you use to fetch me back and froth from work.
I will think of how silly we are in the past.
We used to swim together, play together.
I will also think of how you use to scold me not to buy things and spend money.
How we use to argue over small little things,
How you went to buy my favorite food when I demand that I want it .
How you complain here and there.
How you hug me and pat me to sleep.
more and more and more...
Why will I still think about all this..
Oh Lord,
Bless me with wisdom. :)
I'm so tired of thinking. .
Don't even feel like working anymore,
Feel like just shutting down myself and take a long long rest .
Which is impossible.
Time will show everything.
No point of me thinking so much.
God's bless me please. !
Time to go work. .
BACK to reality .
